freedom within

okay. here it is. that feeling coming over me that says "well. here is the blank page. here is the challenge. make something interesting happen here." and i look through my files and realize that i am not yet in the habit of documenting my handmades, and so i don't have any recent pictures of the things that i am sewing, or knitting, or crafting out of paper. and really, who wants to see a bunch of in-process projects anyway?

then it occurs to me to ask, "cheryl, what exactly IS 'handmade' to you?" seems i've kind of placed my work in a very tiny box labeled "acceptable for blog" and everything else that i make on a regular basis is not appropriate for this project. though i wonder, isn't my ART a very intrinsic form of 'handmade.' i mean really. i make it with my hand (the left one). it serves a purpose, if only to propel me closer to my ideal of cheryl-as-illustrator. generally, my reason for making art is to give it away, and also to nurture relationships. perhaps i should think awhile about what 'handmade' really means to me. it's more than a simple act, a movement of the hands for the purpose of creating a thing. it has momentum derived from the desire to share things with others...among other things.

this illustration is called "freedom within." i didn't know why i chose it initially, though now that i have been writing awhile i think it is rather appropriate. the reason i wanted to write a blog in the first place was so that i could begin to explore my motivations for making, not just simply document the 'stuff' that gets churned out. and in my first and introductory post, i said something about how my perspective of life is changing lately (although i guess it is always changing in various sized increments). i have freed myself somewhat to explore the nature of my choices, and in doing so i have opened up the possibility of understanding more clearly why i do the things i do. partly tied to a rejection of crass consumer culture, handmade also has a loftier connotation. for me, it is a way to connect to others, to use resources wisely, to feel that i am useful, and to bring joy to myself and my recipient.

so tonight, i'm flying out the cage. i'll keep making, moving forward, documenting...and we shall see where i land next february.

so poetic. hehe